You know the feeling you get when you forget a paper is due an hour before you're supposed to turn it in? Or the way you feel when you know you're about to get in trouble? What about the nagging feeling that something is wrong, but you simply can't put your finger on it?
That is sort of how I feel almost all hours of the day.
I can tell that God is currently stretching my faith right now. I mean, this entire deployment has been quite a learning experience in faith already. Recently, God officially took me out of my "deployment comfort zone." I don't want to go into all the details but lets just say, this shit just got real. The events don't really matter. More importantly, is the way I reacted and continue to react to the trials put before me and my fellow soldiers.
I can't say that my faith is such that I don't worry about anything that happens over here. I do worry. There are times that I'm scared, that I'm terrified, but those are the times I simply have to give it all to God. I simply have to put my trust and my life in Jesus. What's interesting is that "simply putting my trust and my life into Jesus' hands" is a constant prayer I have to have. My fears are never completely dissipated, however my fears do not control me, and that is how I know I'm growing.
It is hard. I want to come home so bad. I want to come home and stay home. I want to feel safe. I want to eat good food, and kiss my husband, and bask in the feeling of security. But that isn't where God wants me right now. Right now, I'm on a journey that requires complete separation from my normal comforts. I believe it is Gods way for me to make it a habit to continually talk to him. And I am certainly getting there because if I wasn't in continual conversation with God, I really might have gone crazy by now.
Well. I've now had two blogs in a row that were spiritually in depth. Not that there is a problem with that, but I believe too, that serious conversation should be balanced with light hearted conversation.
I tore out all my favorite photographs from Vogue, Glamour, and various other magazines I've collected since being here, and taped them up on my wall. I'm very pleased with this and I think my friend, Shelbi, would be pleased as well. It definitely helps my chu feel a little more... I don't know. I don't want to say "at home." This is not home. But it makes me feel better when I see vintage-esque Dior adds hanging up on my wall.
PS: Everyone needs to feel GREAT about being allowed to, basically, wear whatever the hell they want. Wearing the same uniform every day for over 365 days, to include nights and weekends, is NOT fun.
This just needed to get on here because it is an a-mazing shot taken by one of our crew chiefs during an awesome lightening storm we had the other day.
And this is on my wall. And I love it.
That is sort of how I feel almost all hours of the day.
I can tell that God is currently stretching my faith right now. I mean, this entire deployment has been quite a learning experience in faith already. Recently, God officially took me out of my "deployment comfort zone." I don't want to go into all the details but lets just say, this shit just got real. The events don't really matter. More importantly, is the way I reacted and continue to react to the trials put before me and my fellow soldiers.
I can't say that my faith is such that I don't worry about anything that happens over here. I do worry. There are times that I'm scared, that I'm terrified, but those are the times I simply have to give it all to God. I simply have to put my trust and my life in Jesus. What's interesting is that "simply putting my trust and my life into Jesus' hands" is a constant prayer I have to have. My fears are never completely dissipated, however my fears do not control me, and that is how I know I'm growing.
It is hard. I want to come home so bad. I want to come home and stay home. I want to feel safe. I want to eat good food, and kiss my husband, and bask in the feeling of security. But that isn't where God wants me right now. Right now, I'm on a journey that requires complete separation from my normal comforts. I believe it is Gods way for me to make it a habit to continually talk to him. And I am certainly getting there because if I wasn't in continual conversation with God, I really might have gone crazy by now.
Well. I've now had two blogs in a row that were spiritually in depth. Not that there is a problem with that, but I believe too, that serious conversation should be balanced with light hearted conversation.
I tore out all my favorite photographs from Vogue, Glamour, and various other magazines I've collected since being here, and taped them up on my wall. I'm very pleased with this and I think my friend, Shelbi, would be pleased as well. It definitely helps my chu feel a little more... I don't know. I don't want to say "at home." This is not home. But it makes me feel better when I see vintage-esque Dior adds hanging up on my wall.
PS: Everyone needs to feel GREAT about being allowed to, basically, wear whatever the hell they want. Wearing the same uniform every day for over 365 days, to include nights and weekends, is NOT fun.
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