Coming to Terms

I love Pinterest. Personally, I love it more than Facebook. I think it's a fantastic website where the online world can come together in one conglomerate of artistic expression. Through pictures we express our hopes, dreams, and selves. We share our excitement about every walk of life ... ever. I love it. It feels like a community and I honestly pray for the longevity of this website because it's awesome.

That being said; I also have to check myself when Pinteresting because it can ruin my day as easy as it can make it. I have to be honest and say that Pinterest fills my head with dreams of becoming some kind of super-human-stylish-exercise-fanatic-wife-mom... thing. And on top of becoming that, I'll also be able to find time and money to travel to that awesome looking Castle in Switzerland and try wine in the remote Tuscan hills of Italy. 

Right. 

At some point I have to take a step back and look at priorities in my life, the budget, and the practicality of me completing 80,000 DYI initiatives. 

So I figured I would put my current priorities into writing. That way, my community can keep me accountable and maybe I'll look back on this when I'm feeling crappy about my lack of ingenuity and remember that there are more important things in life than having the perfect centerpiece for my kitchen table. 

Priority number one is my relationship with God. This is the most pivotal piece in the puzzle because ultimately the growth in my faith dictates the rest of the priorities in my life and how I need to approach them. Currently the steps I'm taking to encourage that growth are: Story Formed Life (SFL) starting sometime in the new year. Also, finding those alone moments to give a few minutes to God -- driving, showering etc. Yeah, I'm still working on diving into the Word... I've never been good at reading the Bible but I think there are other parts of my faith that are being worked on right now. I generally find that forcing a spiritual discipline doesn't result in long-term success. However, in order to try and gradually progress in that area, I plan on using my phone's bible app to read the verse of the day and its corresponding chapter. 

Priority number two is my family. When I say family, I mean Matt and our little peanut. In the current season we're in I think this means preparation. The prepping is the part I have a problem with because I tend to over prep and overwhelm myself with details that don't really matter. 
What matters: That Matt and I have a solid relationship that revolves around loving one another sacrificially. That's what I'm working on right now. I don't mean to, but I keep score. I mentally think about what I've done for him or what he's done for me recently... am I working too hard based on the affection he's shown me? I don't want to think like that. In the book (not the crappy movie) Blue Like Jazz, Donald Miller has a revelation about love and how we as human beings treat love like a monetary transaction. We add up the totals and then decide how much love we can spend on a person based on how much we think they deserve.  At least in my marriage, I want to love Matt because he's my husband and I promised him I would love him So I need to stop keeping score and stop being angry when I think the score is uneven. 
And that's what prepping for this baby should ultimately look like. I can read as many baby books as I want about preparing for this third member of our family, but I think the most important thing that I can do to prepare is love my husband. Unconditionally. 

Priority number three is providing a safe and healthy environment for my family and friends. This is something Matt and I feel very strongly about. We want anyone who walks through our front door to feel safe and at home. To me, this means making sure things are tidy and the food I prepare is mostly healthy. 
Our home will probably never look like the amazing magazine finished photos on Pinterest. ((I need to remember this more than anything)) We don't live in a museum... we live in a house. And that house might have a few dirty dishes in the sink, dust on the mantle, and Boswell/Cora fur balls in the corner. Soon, there will be baby clutter strewn about. But we sort of feel that as long as it doesn't smell like ass, there are plenty of comfy places to sit, and there's a contained-lived-in-messiness, we're doing a good job. Safe and healthy also looks like eating organic and natural-straight-from-the-source foods. Honestly, I was kind of raised this way and I think it makes perfect sense. I feel and look my best when I'm eating healthy and natural. It doesn't mean we won't order a pizza every now and then and we will certainly never turn down free food or a chance to go out and eat with our lovely community. It means that the decisions we make at the grocery store are going to be based on simple ingredients that occur naturally and not man made GMO's. 

So there. Catie, Pinterest should be used as a tool to help you achieve these priorities... not guilt you into feeling less than. When you start feeling less than, you start getting jealous and there is no room for any of that in your life. Catie, you are blessed and it's up to you to realize it. 

Now, back to Pinterest :) 

Up to date and exactly 18 weeks :)

Yay! No more posting behind everyone's back. The gig is up, the cat is out of the bag -- I'm pregnant and a solid 18 weeks pregnant at that. So here's what you missed between weeks 9-18... don't worry it isn't a whole lot. 

Around week 10 I started noticing a slight different in my appetite and morning sickness in general. It continued to get better every day and by week 14 (the beginning of the second trimester), I felt great! My energy is up, I don't have any nausea, and you might even say that I kind of enjoy being pregnant. Now that I'm not dealing with food aversions (except for ground beef with any kind of tomato based sauce), gagging that turns into vomiting, or the need to eat every like 15 minutes, I'm having a good time. 

The second trimester is a wonderful place to be. 

It's especially exciting because every day that tiny baby is growing and so is my belly :) I'm starting to look like I have real baby bump instead of looking like I had a heavy lunch with a beer.

We got to hear the baby's heartbeat around week 14. That was awesome. For us, it was the first official sign of a baby. At 14 weeks I wasn't showing, I couldn't feel any movement (I still haven't felt anything yet - hopefully soon!), but actually hearing the pulse of another living thing... inside of me... it was just the coolest thing. It was also amazing to find out that even at such a young gestation, the baby is kicking and punching and moving all over. My update told me that my baby is yawning, hiccuping, sucking and swallowing, twisting, rolling, peeing, punching and kicking... not all at once of course but those are all the things an 18 week old baby can do. So talented.

Tomorrow we'll schedule our first ultrasound. The ultrasound will tell us a lot about the health of our baby... but should also tell us if baby is a boy or a girl. And yes, we will be finding out and hopefully we'll find out before Christmas! I'm thinking boy :) But we'll just have to wait and see. 

Emotionally, I feel pretty stable. Much more stable than the first trimester. However, now I day dream about our baby; about what he/she look like, smell like, act like... I think about this time next year. We'll have a 7 month old in toe, "helping" us decorate for the Holidays. I get excited about little things like buying Christmas pajamas (Children outfitted in fleece sleepers are the cutest!) and inserting various Holiday traditions into our family. 

I think about family vacations and car rides that involve a lot of raffi and The Civil Wars. 

I remember driving around with my mom and dad in the car when I was like three. Running errands with my mother is the reason why I still know, to this very day, every word to Joseph and the Amazing Technicolored Dreamcoat. I remember the best way to start the morning as a child was to snuggle with my mom. So now that I'm on the cusp of being in my mothers shoes, I can't help but think that I'll get to share those very same moments with my children. And oh my goodness! It makes me so excited. 

I know all this is probably enough to make a lot of people gag and think, "save it for Halmark, honey." But don't worry, that season will probably come to you one of these days. And when it does, you'll find yourself tearing up over your unborn child too. 

The beginnings of a birth plan.

So a lot of people... okay a lot of women, like to know certain things about pregnant women. As a pregnant woman, I like to know certain things about other pregnant women so I'm not bothered by the same questions I repeatedly get...yet. It's still early. 
Questions like "how are you feeling, how far along are you, did you get morning sickness, is it a boy or a girl," and the ultimate preggo question is usually asked in a series of questions but can be summed up by saying, "what's your birth plan?"

So I figured I'd go ahead and blog about the rough outline of mine because Matt and I have a pretty clear picture of how an ideal day in labor would go. (When I say Matt and I, I really mean I have a pretty clear idea of what I want and Matt is fine with whatever as long as I don't do a home birth.)

I think I've already mentioned that I'm seeing the tri-health Midwife clinic in Cincinnati. I  think a lot of people have misconceptions about what a Midwife is and what she does. A clinically certified Midwife is basically a nurse that has been certified by the by the American College of Nurse Midwives. All the midwives at tri-health have their CNM. We chose the midwife route because Midwives are use to facilitating natural childbirth. They don't push for medication or c-section unless its absolutely necessary or the mother demands it. The percentage of C-sections in America has increased something like 30% since the 1980's and a lot of it has to with the fact that c-sections take a fraction of the time for a doctor to perform compared to vaginal birth. Watch The Business of Being Born on Netflix... kind of crazy.

In February I'll start my third trimester and I'll start Bradley classes. The Bradley Birthing Method has been around since the 40's or something crazy like that but it boasts of an 86% un-medicated birth rate. That's not too shabby and because I would prefer to give birth naturally and un-medicated I decided this is the way to go. Why natural? There are a few different reasons why and I will probably end up having a post dedicated only to natural childbirth but not today. 

I am aware that most labors end with a happy and healthy mother and child but almost all labors never go as planned. And I'm okay that. I'm not trying to prove anything to any one by attempting an un-medicated birth. It is just my preference and what I think it best for me and baby. Every woman is different and has different ideas of what her labor will look like and I truly believe there isn't a right or wrong way. 

Morning Sickness Fun

Remember that joyful-4-weeks-pregnant-with-no-morning-sickness-whatsoever girl from the last blog? Okay well she's been replaced by something emotional and sickly. Because guess what? I'm not in the lucky 1/3 of the pregnant population who doesn't get morning sickness. As soon as week six hit, I noticed a drastic change in my appetite. I went from always being hungry and eating everything in sight, to always being hungry, usually being nauseous and never able to figure out what it is I want. It's been about a week or so since I thought something truly tasted good. It's a pretty vicious cycle - I have to eat to keep from throwing up, but if I don't eat the right thing, at the right pace, in the right amount I'm sure to throw up anyway. And if I do throw up, it's harder to get back to the place where I can eat anything at all. But I HAVE to eat or I'll just get sick again.
Thankfully, I have a wonderful husband who has been exceedingly patient through this new stage of pregnancy. I think his ears are finely tuned to hear the sound of my puking because he is immediately by my side, rubbing my back. He makes me food, picks up my weird food requests, and doesn't get upset when I only eat a few bites or none of it at all.
I'm at  9 weeks now. 5 weeks to go until I'm out of this dreaded first trimester and into the second. 
Recently we've discovered I have the best mornings when I drink a protein shake in bed and eat something solid afterword. Once again, Matt has been crucial in this. I literally cannot express the amount of gratitude I have for him. He's been more than awesome and supportive. He lets me lay in bed for a solid 45 minutes while he gets ready, takes the dogs out, makes our lunches, feeds the dogs, and all the while getting me what I need. That's love, people.

This past Tuesday I went to my first mid-wife appointment. It went well, but wasn't all that exciting. They drew blood and asked me a bunch of health related questions and then gave me more information about their practice. I'm a little disappointed that I don't see the same mid-wife for my appointments/for my labor. But they work really hard to introduce you to all of them. My official due date is May 9th :) Right now it seems so far away and that's just fine because I'm sure I can use the next 7.5 months to get ready. My next appointment is November 1st and by then I'll be days away from my second trimester AND we'll get to hear the heartbeat. The week before Christmas is when we get to know the sex of the baby so we're pretty excited about a Christmas day gender reveal present for the family.

So that's about it in pregnancy land.

The first pregnancy blog ((6 weeks pregnant))

By the time this is actually read by anyone, it will probably be about eight weeks from when I first wrote it. But since the contents of this message have been a secret until the appointed time it was necessary :)

I expect that by now, family, friends and facebook will all know that Matt and I are expecting our first child in May 2013! We are overjoyed, elated, nervous, and a little scared. But we really couldn't be happier for this awesome blessing.

I want to document as much as I can about this momentous time in our life. So I'll start from the beginning.

In the middle of July Matt and I made the decision to give up any and all forms of birth control. We were definitely feeling called to surrender that aspect of our life to God and I'll admit, it was freeing and a bit exhilerating all in one. We weren't trying to get pregnant, but we weren't not trying either. The timing would be right no matter what, and so we trusted.

Whelp. Fast foward to the day before Labor Day. After a raucus day of roller coasters at Kings Island, I told Matt and I was a few days late and suggested we go buy a pregnancy test and tampons.... one of them was going to be necessary.
The next morning we found out the pregnancy test was a good choice because those two bars showed up faster than you can say anything... ever.

I have to admit the initial reaction was one of shock. I think we were both shaking; unsure what to do next. We felt like we needed to go somewhere to get it all medically confirmed but we don't have physician we regularly see sooo off to Urgent Care we went! We got a very solemn confirmation at Urgent Care that I was, indeed, pregnant. I proceeded to downloaded the first pregnancy app I could find on my phone to keep me updated on baby's progress. After that, Matt and I went to Brueggers Bagels to have a celebratory breakfast. We also went to Brueggers the day Matt proposed  so it's kind of a special spot for us.
He asked me how I was feeling, and I said I felt great! and that I was just really hungry.

As of today, I'm six weeks. I feel remarkably well. I have a bit of a cold which seems to be going around, but other than that and constantly being hungry, I'm good. Sometimes I have random gagging fits. That's always weird and uncomfortable. I don't know what it stems from because I don't feel nauseous before or after it happens.

At the moment we don't have an OB/Midwife. Weird insurance issues have me in a gray area as far as health-care goes. The rudimentary plan right now is to have the baby at Good Samaritan hospital. We'd like to have a midwife deliver and I have every intention of delivering this baby naturally. Between Matt, possible Doula and Bradley Classes I think we can make that work. That's about all I know about the birth plan. Good thing we've got another 8 months to figure it all out.

Boy or Girl? Matt and I have no preference. We want a healthy baby. However, two of my closest friends are already convinced I'm having a boy. And What to expect when you're expecting says that constant hunger is indicative of a boy. At the same time, the Chinese Gender chart says to think pink and Matt has sworn to go against what everyone else says so he's saying girl as well. And I have no clue. Not even an inkling. I guess I'm leaning towards boy because of popular thought.

As of today!
Baby is: A quarter of an inch long - the size of a lentil bean
Currently craving: Everything but sweets.
Currently Averting: Maybe hard boiled eggs, chocolate, and candy.
Looking forward to: Buying our house and designing a nursery
Not looking forward to: The possibility of actually having morning sickness

So here's to the first of many blogs about my journey into motherhood.

Show and Tell

It really is a magical time in every child’s life. The chance to bring a few items you love dearly into your classroom for all your classmates (and your teacher) to see. The last time (and maybe the only time) I did show and tell I was in Kindergarten and I honestly couldn't tell you what I brought with me that day. However, I do remember the feeling of proudly bringing my items into school. I remember the anticipation of showing everyone the things that defined me as a six year old girl. If I had to guess, I probably brought in my ballet shoes, my ugly green pillow thing I slept with at night, and maybe a Barbie or one of my brothers GI Joe action figures (I remember playing with both. There was one GI Joe that looked like he could almost be a she because he wore a beret and didn't have a plastic beard).
I remember pulling my three items out of the box, excited to share because my classmates were excited to see. How do I know they were excited to see? Because even when it wasn't your day for show and tell, you were excited to know what little trinkets your friends brought in. Would they be the same as yours? Could you perhaps play with it later in the day? Maybe it would be a good thing to put on the next Christmas list.

So then imagine show and tell if one of the kids were to just "tell." That doesn't really sit well with anyone who is expecting "show and tell." We want to see the evidence of this thing that is so meaningful in your life not just hear you talk about it. Let's say I really did bring in my ballet slippers. I think at that point I had been doing ballet for about a year and a half. When I held them up for everyone to see, they would have had tangible evidence that I was really doing what I came to tell them. If I put them on to show my sweet dance moves, one of the students might be inspired to try ballet as well. But if I didn't actually have them, the students would be disengaged and maybe even a little skeptical.

Fast-forward 17ish years to today. I'm reading a book. This book talks a lot about Mother Theresa. It's not a book about her, but the author of the book did missions with her in Calcutta and so of course she is mentioned a few times. When he first got in contact with her he spilled out his desire to go to India and serve with her. Her response was an invitation, albeit, a simple one. "Come." She said. A hundred pages later the author added to this simple invitation with "come and see." You see, this guy Shane is trying to live his life according to a much different standard than anything most of us have ever seen... especially me. He says, "... the only way I know to invite people into... faith is to "Come and see. After all, I'm not just trying to get someone to sign a doctrinal statement, but to come to know love, grace, and peace..."

Upon reading that I was given the thought "it’s like show and tell. You have to be able to show people if you're going to tell them or there is no evidence."

 Oh shit. That makes sense.

And then I asked myself, "Catie, are you living a life in which love, grace and peace are immediately and overwhelmingly present?"

 Oh shit. No. No, I don't know that I am. I've become really good at telling. Really good at understanding. But showing? Living that way? I'm not so sure. And let me clarify that when I say 'show', I don't mean 'show off' or to 'put on a show.' I mean it as an invitation to "come and see."

Alright. So here is my plan of action. It isn't going to be a night and day change. This is a change that starts with the heart and then slowly and surely moves outward. This is the initial stake in the ground. This part of me has been claimed and there will be future ground breaking and building upon it. I know now that trying to duplicate another person’s work to a T is the surest way to fail. We're all called to the same kind of work -- to love others as we love ourselves. However, we are all very different and so the manner in which the work is done must be as varied and different as the people it is to serve.
My hope is that in five years, someone will read this blog and then be able to look at my life with honesty and a little grace and say, "She made good on her plan. I see the beginnings; I see where she started on a different trajectory."

I would be remiss if I didn't share the title of the book and give a big "thank you!" to the author for his story. It's called The Irresistible Revolution and it's by Shane Claiborne. If it sounds like something you'd like to read, I will go out and buy it for you. Seriously. Let me know. I will buy it. And if you don't live within a 30 mile radius of Cincinnati, I'll ship it to you as well.

Some sense of peace

There is something that I've grown increasingly aware of over the last few weeks. Something I've always known but never given the amount of thought that it requires. I'm talking about the human condition. And when I say human condition I mean why we are the way we are and why we do the things we do. Good or bad. Right or wrong. But for the purpose of this blog, I'm speaking in terms of the wrong we all do and how we judge people for the wrong they do too.

So let me break off and consider the term "human condition." What is our condition? What are the universal truths about humans? Well in my understanding, we all abide by some kind of moral code. Even the most "immoral" of human beings has a line they won't cross although those of us who consider them to be immoral would say they crossed that line a thousand miles ago. As an example let’s take Hitler because he doesn't require a whole lot of background information. 99% of those who know of him would say he was a morally depraved man. I would certainly be counted in that 99%. His crimes are atrocious and legendary. Worldwide his actions are deemed completely out of line and unethical. However, I'm sure he had a clear cut idea of what was "too far." He had his own morals and his own ideas on what he would or would not do to achieve the ultimate goal. He had his own moral code, if you will. Albeit that moral code was not in good standing with the morals of most of the world... this leads me to the conclusion that the world holds a moral standard that varies but is ultimately trying to preserve some sense of peace.

I would say there are two different kinds of peace; inward peace, and outward peace. Inward peace is that place where we feel content and happy and the world seems like its lining up in a certain way that favors us. I think everyone is continually searching for inward peace which then makes the job of attaining outward peace nearly impossible. The human track record for outward peace keeping is not a very good one... worldwide, nationally, in our families or among our friends. We constantly struggle to keep order in our lives. And it's everyone’s struggle. Despite our desire to have peace we continually do things of our own accord to mess it up. Everyone does. Everyone has said something they didn't mean to someone they love. Everyone has been a flakey friend. Everyone has told a lie. Everyone has felt entitled to get their own before someone else. We are all selfish and yet we still strive to do what is right because that provides a sense of peace all on its own. Its often the harder peace to attain... it might not be as instantaneous, it often involves sacrifice, but usually we find the kinder we are, the more we receive that kindness back and that brings us peace.  

So if everyone is fighting this great inward/outward battle, why are we so quick to judge everyone? The ironic thing is that in America, everyone generally agrees it's a terrible thing to judge others and I'd say we're the best prosecutors of them all. 
We've all said, "well if I had so-and-so's money I would give this much away." Or "If I had that kind of power, I would help do this with it." But would we really? I cannot currently think of any one leader who had power and or money who did not abuse that power/money in some way at some point in time. Not that they never did good with it, but at some point, there was abuse.  

Whether you believe in anything spiritual or nothing at all, this is the fact: No one is perfect. And while some of us were born with an advantage in life, (loving family, all needs provided for, etc) we have all had disadvantages too; we all have to contend with thousands of outside forces that come crashing in at us through-out our entire life. Those events shape us into who we are today: the good with the bad, the pretty with the ugly. And through all of this, our ultimate goal is to find peace and bring order and meaning to our lives.
And so what I'm finally trying to get at is this: Despite all of what I just mentioned, we love to judge and many times that judgment breeds hate. We love to feel like we can cast off our problems and issues onto the last person who affronted us. We love to hate people we don't even know. Think about the celebrities or the political people who have made some choice that you either a) did not agree with or b) did not line up with the way you think things should be. Were you almost giddy with anger? Did it make you feel just a little good to cry out indignantly, "Who do they think they are?" Okay well that's how I feel when I think my anger is justified. Sometimes I know I'm being silly and immature. But other times I think, "See? I'm being treated unfairly! This person is horrible." It turns into a hate high.

I think about how joyful people were that Osama Bin Laden was dead. People were partying, people were celebrating. I'm sure I said my own choice words about how the world was better off without him... but now that I think about it our reaction to his death was terrible. Relief is one thing, but pure joy at the death of a man is sort of ... barbaric. He was raised in a culture in which he could not ask questions and from the time he was able to comprehend anything he first comprehended that America is a great evil power. At the same time, there were hundreds of thousands of American born men who were fed the American dream… aren’t we all a product of our upbringing? I suppose you could say, “Shame on Bin Laden for not looking outside the only things he knew.” But how many of us have judged someone for a spiritual belief they did or did not have? Christians, atheists, agnostics, and Muslims alike are all guilty in some way or another.

More recently I think about the young man who tore into the Aurora Colorado movie theatre and killed something like 12 people and injured dozens more. I don't know if they've concluded that he's mentally unstable, if he was trying to fulfill some weird fantasy, or if he had a death wish for some of the people in that specific theatre but in any case it's extremely sad and heart wrenching especially for the families of those lost. I've heard plenty of people say terrible things said about the young man who committed the crime... from people who don't know him. I'm not saying we should all add him as a friend on Facebook or try to spring him out of jail. He will rightfully be judged according to the law and punished. But what does it do for any of us or for him to keep repeating hateful words? It does nothing but feed the anger in our heart. And if every single overwhelmingly hateful word were to intentionally be passed on to him, what purpose would that serve? Does that help the victims and their families? Will that finally give us peace about the situation? 

Same with the Chik-fil-a debacle that's going on. That's just fine if you don't want to give them your money. But I've seen more "I hate Chik-Fil-A" statuses on Facebook than I care to count. Hate breeds hate - so if you think that Chik-fil-a is part of that formula then be the first person to stop the cycle. Inform yourself, understand the man behind the decision and choose your words wisely when forming an opinion. Maybe that's not possible in a Facebook status and if it's not, maybe it shouldn't be one.  

In conclusion, if we all strove for outward peace before inward peace, I think we would find that inward peace can be fulfilled. If our gut reaction was to love instead of judge in any given circumstance, what kind of world would this be?

So yeah, that's pretty much all I got. It's been something that's been stewing in my head for a while and I'm finally at the point where I realize I'm convicted with this crime as much as anyone. So to my friends and family -- hold me accountable. Don't let me even mutter words of contempt towards anyone. It is the least proactive thing I could do.


Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.

Love is: patient, kind
Love is not: boastful, proud, self-seeking, easily angered.
Love does not: envy, dishonor others, keep a record of wrongs, enjoy evil 
Love always: celebrates the truth, protects, trusts, hopes and perseveres.

Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.

House Hunting

I think this is going to be a very helpful blog for my thought process on what I'm looking for in a house. For anyone reading this who doesn’t already know, Matt and I are officially in the house hunting process! We weren't really expecting it, but somehow it became the most logical financial move to make. We're currently a one car family, which has worked out remarkably well over the last nine months. However, my wonderfully creative husband now has a job working at Crossroads in Cincinnati... I'm still in school at NKU and our apartment is also on the Kentucky side of the river. On top of that, I have to be at Ft. Knox one weekend of every month for another two or so years and weekends are Matt’s busiest time of the week... yeah, it's going to get a bit hectic.

Now I understand that the most logical explanation to all this mess would be for us to buy a car. New, used - anything that can get us from point A to point B.  This was our plan as well until we started looking at prices for used cars and then prices of new cars...and all along we keep going back to the fact that every car (unless it's vintage) depreciates in value as soon as you drive it off the lot and who wants another car payment that runs between $100 and $300? Certainly not us. Logically, we decided, if we can't afford a car... we're going to buy a house. Ha! I know that sounds crazy, but we already throw away about $750 a month into our rent anyway. That doesn't include utilities. The beautiful thing about buying a house is a) most of the mortgage payments for the houses we're looking into will cost us less than our current rent and b) we're actually putting our money into something... not just handing it over to our Apartment complex.  

So now that's explained - the real purpose of this blog was to talk about my hopes and dreams for whatever house we end up with. I've been scowering pinterest for any and all ideas. However, I am trying to be realistic, practical and a little hopeful as I search. I'm very aware that Matt and I will never own a home like this:

And I'm okay with that. However, there are certain things I know Matt and I can accomplish and that list goes something like this: 

                                                                               Organization. I want everything to have a place - not that everything has to be in its place at all times, but when we go to clean up, I want it to be super easy to simply put whatever in its designated bin or drawer. At the moment, we don't have the storage space for everything to be organized in that way and we can't go building shelves or extra cabinets. Personally, I hate fighting with inanimate objects for space. Sometimes I won't put away a pot or a pan because I hate trying to jiggle everything just right in order to make it all fit.

All of these organizational techniques makes me so so so so very happy. I'm not naturally an organized person. I lack the OCD for it I think, but I DO truly appreciate organization. And although it might drive me a touch crazy sometimes, Matt does have the OCD for organization, so I know he'll be especially helpful in making sure these projects happen.



Style. I don't mean IN style. I mean, our style. I want our friends and families to walk in our house and say, "Matt and Catie live here." Matt is naturally inclined to rustic, wooden textures and colors and I'm naturally inclined to beachy clean styles and palettes. He's a cozy cabin in the woods -- 

and I'm a classic Charleston beachhouse. However, I think combining these two aesthetics is even better than trying to attain one or the other. We both appreciate each other’s style and so blending them together is natural and easy. I want this to come across.

Comfort. We have talked extensively about making our house a home for anyone who crosses the threshold. I want people to feel invited, comfortable, and safe. I think this kind of ties into the organization bit as well. I don't want chaos, but I certainly don't need perfection. I grew up in a house where a stain on the carpet was not the end of the world, and dirty feet and hands were a common occurrence. It was neat and organized but not freakishly clean. Rigid is not a word I would use to describe my family and it is NOT the word I want when people describe my house.

That's pretty much it... This wasn't what we described to our realtor, of course. However, I think we listed off the practical things that could help us achieve these goals: three bedroom, two bath, decent yard, full basement, and fairly large common areas. Hardwood floors and a working fireplace are also things we're hoping for.

We start our search today, so let the hunt begin!

Forks over Knives

Get ready for a long one, because I'm discussing nutrition and theology - two of my passions in life. I should also throw out a disclaimer that the religious nature of my blogs is simply a product of learning and growing in my faith. I do not mean to offend anyone or shove my beliefs down the throats of others. This is me simply writing about my life as I see it.

So last night, Matt and I watched the documentary Forks over Knives. I thought it had a lot of really good insights on cancer, obesity, heart disease, diabetes, and every other degenerating disease Americans seem to suffer from. It really helped me to contextualize the rate at which these diseases occur compared to other countries in the world. This all leads me to believe what my own mother has been saying all along - our diet of processed foods, trans fats and high fructose corn syrup is the # 1 thing to blame for the aforementioned afflictions our country faces. That, coupled with our insatiable need to eat meat and dairy at every meal, is the source for our debilitating health status.

The doctors and biologists featured in this documentary gave absolutely amazing stats. They have study after study showing that a proper diet of whole foods and plant based meals will prevent cancer cell growth AND eliminate cancer as well. There are statistics that show 18% of our population actually have pre-cancerous cells due to genetics. Which means something else is contributing to the rise of cancer patients we've had since the 1950's. Here's another little fact - The 1950's was the start of "convenience" and fast foods and the push for more milk and meat in our diets. This is also the time in which heart disease, cancer, type 2 diabetes, and all that other jazz started to increase. Coincidence? I highly doubt it.

Featured in the documentary were also patients who had undergone heart surgeries and battled cancer - many of them were told to prepare for death. Their medications weren't doing the job and they could expect to die within a year. Not ready to throw the towel in just yet, they searched for a more holistic approach to their problem and found eating a whole foods, plant based diet might just cure every issue they have. And it did. Most of these people took between 2-6 medications a day for their health problems. In months, they cut their medications in half, improved their energy level, and even reversed the diseases they had in the first place.

I'm sorry, but the evidence is so obvious. My own grandfather told me about eight months ago that he was going on this diet. I was surprised - Granddaddy is a meat loving, salt adding, cheese on everything kind of guy. But he had some health issues as men in their 70's often do, and he wanted to cut back on his medications. Today, I think he's lost something like 20 pounds and he is taking less than half of the medications he was taking just a few months ago. He's healthy, he feels great and I'm pretty sure he's added years to his life.

Now for the theological portion. A few months ago, Matt and I decided to cut way back on meat. We're not strictly vegetarian but we realized that we felt better, our skin improved, and we didn't feel as sluggish after meals when we restricted the amount of meat we ate. After praying about it and investigating just what the Bible says about food, we came to the conclusion that we would start a pseudo-vegetarian diet. We reserve meat for when we're eating with our friends and family, but in our house, we don't have any meat (Except the celebratory steaks I bought for Matt). We both felt this diet was closer to what God intended originally. 

Before the fall, Adam and Eve were vegans. They lived in harmony with every living creature and all living creatures lived in harmony with each other.

Genesis 1:29 And God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food.

Even the other animals were vegetarians.

Genesis 1:30 And to every beast of the earth and to every bird of the heavens and to everything that creeps on the earth, everything that has the breath of life, I have given every green plant for food.” And it was so.

After the fall, the world order was shifted and the food chain was created. God tells Noah he is free to eat whatever he can.

Genesis 9: 2 The fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth and upon every bird of the heavens, upon everything that creeps on the ground and all the fish of the sea. Into your hand they are delivered. ³  Every moving thing that lives shall be food for you. And as I gave you the green plants, I give you everything.

It's my belief that God knew as the flood waters receded and Noah's progeny multiplied, the expansion of cultures would bring people to live in extreme conditions (the arctic, the desert etc) and they would not have access to as many plants or grains. Instead, they would need the higher fat and protein from fatty meats for energy to make it through the harsh climates. It is for this reason; I believe we are permitted to eat meat. However, as Americans - most of us don't spend all day outside cultivating the land for food. We don't spend hours of our lives trying to survive. We sit in air conditioned/heated rooms for 8 hours a day (some of us are running around watching children - usually inside as well). Our lives are not difficult (all things considered) and therefore, our diets don't need to be filled with the higher protein and fat dairy and meat provide.

This is all to say, I believe the closer we get to the way things were intended in all things - food, relationships, morals etc - the healthier we are in mind, body and spirit.

Now Matt and I have another step to getting our diet on track - keeping the dairy products to a minimum. This is going to be hard because we love cheese and we use milk daily in cereal, coffee, and cooking recipes. However, I think we can start substituting with almond milk - I hate soy milk so that won't work. I don't think meat and dairy are foods we need to avoid like the plague. There are vitamins and nutrients we can get from both of them, however, the amount and the rate at which we consume these products is too much. I wasn't sold on the dairy thing until I watched this documentary. I still have some questions about it though. I know that goat milk is better for us than cow milk and the majority of the world actually consumes goat milk instead. So I'm curious if goat milk is something our bodies handle better.  Over all I definitely see the benefits of increasing fruits, veggies, and whole grains and decreasing dairy, meat, and animal based oils.

I'm actually excited. Understanding why it's so important to eat this way helps to solidify my reserve to keep cooking this way. By the time we try to start having kids, I want it to be a habit. Right now, we're experimenting with recipes trying to figure out what works and what doesn't. We both have cravings and still eat out more than we should, but I think we have a clearer understanding about food.

If you have Netflix, go watch Knives over Forks. It's streaming for free right now. If you don't have Netflix, find a friend who does and make them watch it with you.

You can also visit http://www.forksoverknives.com/ for more information and recipes!

I made pesto!

And I finished school! But I'm more excited about making pesto. It's actually super easy as long as you have a food processor and thanks to Kohls (Or, Mizz Kohls as Matt would say) we finally got one! So the great thing about making pesto is that it's super easy, super fast, and super tasty! 

The bad thing about making pesto is that pine nuts are one of the main ingredients and pine nuts are stupidly expensive! The Kroger brand baggie of pine nuts is literally 1/2 cup and roughly $5.50. What's up with that? I haven't looked into where pine nuts are from or why they are so expensive, but my reasoning tells me that pine nuts come from pine trees and pine trees are literally everywhere but the tropics/ deserts/ the amazon... I think. Therefore, the supply of pine nuts should be plentiful and the demand... I'm not so sure about, but I'll tell you what I am sure about - pine nuts are way too freaking expensive. I realize I could Google it really quick and keep myself from sounding as ignorant as I am, but I'll save the real reason pine nuts are so expensive for another blog. 

Anyway, I made pesto and after making my pesto I put about a tablespoonish of it on some leftover rice, along with a little butter, microwaved it for a minute and a halfish and garnished it with goat cheese. I finished off lunch with an orange. It was all very delicious. I wish I had the drive to create new foods everyday instead of sticking with the same old soup and sandwich schtick. Not that soup and sandwiches aren't delicious, but too often, I keep myself from making new foods because other things are more convenient. 

Okay, I want to back up to the part of the paragraph where I was talking about goat cheese. Because I'm obsessed with goat cheese. I'm pretty sure goat milk would be even more disgusting than regular milk (I love all dairy products, I even have milk in my cereal, but I cannot drink white milk by itself without gagging), however, goat cheese is like the ranch of cheese. You can put it on anything and it makes food taste incredible. Put it in a salad with cranberries, use it instead of Parmesan on pasta, smear it on a Triscuit with a cherry tomato a basil.... There are just endless and wonderful things one can do with goat cheese. Too bad it's also more expensive than your average crumbled feta or blue cheese. Oh well. 


In further news, I've finally come to the conclusion that I'm switching my major. Currently I'm doing Public Relations with a minor in history. But I've already re-registered for fall classes with the intention of getting my BA in history with a minor in Medieval and Renaissance studies. I'm EXTREMELY excited about this. I have a passion for history and if Matt can get a salary paying job with a BFA in musical theatre, By God, I can do something awesome with my history degree. 


So yes, Matt did get an AWESOME job offer from the church we attend in Cincinnati. And he excepted (duh) and his first day is May 22. We're pretty excited about this. Crossroads is notorious for taking care of their employees and their families and it shows. We feel so absolutely blessed and its such a perfect confirmation that God works in mysterious and awesome ways. This time last year, we were wondering if I was going to make it out of Taji, all the while questioning why Matt wasn't getting the kind of work he had been told he would get. Well, I'm back from the desert and he's back from LA and I don't think either of us would change anything. We love Cincinnati, we love our community, and there is no doubt in either of our minds that we're right where we need to be. It's a nice feeling. 


I'm jumping around a lot but I have to mention that I finished my first semester back at school and I feel pretty good about it. I ended up with all A's and one B+. I'm very pleased. Summer break couldn't have come at a more perfect time. I'll be ready for classes to start in August but until then, I'm going to enjoy myself!  


Well that's pretty much all I have to say for the day. In a final summation of this blog - I made pesto. It was good, but the price of pine nuts suck. I love goat cheese. Matt got a job - Praise the Lord! And my first semester back at school was pretty sweet. 

Apparently I can't blog and be in school at the same time

Unfortunately being back at NKU means writing 800 papers, which then makes me not want to write anything else - ever. Well, that's a little extreme. I just haven't had any motivation to write on here because I spend so much time on my laptop and I don't want to spend a second more on it than I have to. Even my Pinteresting has come to a severe decline. However, I suddenly had a burst of motivation to write a quick update blog. I think this happened because I have less than a month until I'm done with the first half of my Junior year :D 

I really like being back at school, but I'm not sure how long that's going to last. The rest of my friends who didn't graduate last May, graduate this May. And I've found that the social college life I enjoyed before my deployment, isn't really what I'm looking for now that my deployment is over. I just don't have a community in college and I'm not necessarily looking for one. I'm married, I'm not a huge party kind of person, and I'm 23 with most of my High School and early college friends already done with their college career. So I'm kind of ready for summer break. Actually, I'm VERY ready for summer break. 

The last two summers have kind of sucked. The year before last I was counting down my days with friends and family before I started pre-deployment training and then last summer I was obviously in a desert. I think now is a good time to make a list of things I'm excited for this summer (I love lists). 

1) Laying out at the pool. Now, I should explain that I actually did this last summer. There was a pool at Camp Taji and I frequented this pool on my day off. But now I don't have to look at ugly dust, worry about Incoming alarms, or be outnumbered by males 10:1. Also, I can enjoy the pool with Matt AND it's not a mile away and its not 130 degrees outside. God Bless America (Except the parts that resemble Iraq). 

Pool times!

2) Grilling out! There is nothing that says "It's Summer Time!" like the smell of freshly grilled meet, veggies, pineapple, whatever-the-hell-food-you-want-to-grill! Matt and I don't have a grill and we aren't permitted to have one because we live in an apartment, but I'm pretty certain our friends and family will be grilling out a few times this summer :) <--- Emoticons replace punctuation. 

Just a stock photo of grillin' out

3) Lake-house! My best friend, Melissa, has the most awesome lake-house ever. Well its not just hers - her dads side of the family owns it. But we always have the most amazing time going out on the pontoon, drinking mixed drinks, driving the jet-ski (before we've had the mixed drinks, of course) and TUBING.  There is literally no cell phone reception, internet, or even a Starbucks nearby. It is the perfect getaway and I LOVE it.

 <3

4) Experimental Cooking! For my birthday, Matt got me two awesome cook books. One was a binder filled with recipes I grew up with. He asked my mom for my favorite home cooked meals and so now I have that little part of my past to take with my into my future. He also got me my very first official cookbook called Clean Foods  by Terry Walters - It's a seasonal guide to eating close to the source. It's mostly vegetarian and it gives you recipes based on the seasons and what is naturally growing in winter, spring, summer and fall. I love it. Matt and I made the decision a few months ago to go pseudo-vegetarian. Basically, we're just limiting the amount of meat we eat. We've stopped buying meat from the grocery, but we have no problem enjoying it at a friends house or when we go out to eat. There was a lot that went into this decision so I'll have to save it for another blog. 

Get it! 

5) More time to  play with Boswell, tan, work out, and spend time with the people I love! Working, going to school full time, and trying to make meals that are healthy instead of eating out all the time is very time consuming. But when I'm just working part-time, I'll have a chance to really rejuvenate and get back into a work-out schedule! Matt and I took Boswell for a little run the other day and he did great! I'm thinking I've found my new running buddy when Matt isn't around :) 

This is Boswell. He's my favorite. 

So that's the update/the plan for the summer.

In a quick summation - life is good, school is good, lots of papers, can't wait for summer, got a dog, and I'll hopefully be updating more often in a month! 

Catie Home-Maker

Isn't it funny how much we don't want to be like our parents growing up?  Aaaand what's even more funny is how we turn into them without realizing its even happening...  Inevitably, we all come to a point in our life when we do come to find - The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, now does it? 


As a girl, a series of events in which little Catie got burnt by stove-top and or oven, quickly had me swearing that I would never cook like my mother. My mom always had home made meals prepared for us breakfast, lunch and dinner. We only ate out on vacation/REALLY special occasions. I probably asked for McDonalds every time we drove by it and I was greeted with a very resounding and resolute, "No, Catie, we have food at home." 
"Well I know we have food at home, mom, but I don't want that food".... I wasn't a very appreciative child when it came to the healthy and balanced meals my parents provided me. (Dad cooked too, but it was definitely more of moms thing.) So, until rather recently, I just knew I would never cook. It wasn't something I was sad to admit, it was an absolute statement that I would NOT be cooking meals. I would marry a chef if I had to or a Boyscout because they cook over fires and fires are even more unpredictable than ovens. 


Well guess what... I love cooking. I love the produce section of Kroger. I love grilled onions and peppers in everything. I like baking, sauteing, grilling, crock-potting, and boiling. I like looking up recipes and gathering up the specific ingredients needed for whatever the hell I'm getting ready to whip up. But, what I love the most about cooking - is serving. I like knowing that I picked out healthy, and usually, organic/natural foods to give my guests. I like the look of someone being satisfied from something I did. I'm still in the process of trying different recipes out. I'm no Rachael Ray, Alton Brown, Paula Deen or Bobby Flay or any of those other fancy chefs on Food network. But I have yet to see anyone run to the bathroom or suavely spit a bite of something out into their napkin.  


I think another reason for my new found joy of cooking has to do with having real cookware and cooking utensils. Let me tell you two things that will change your idea of cooking/preparing healthy meals, especially if you're afraid to use vegetables. 


1. The Chopper aka the Chop Chop - This magical device prevents anyone from chopping up vegetables with a knife ever again. I can use the chop chop on anything and it takes a fraction of the time. Even though I have to chop smaller portions at a time, its still MUCH faster than taking a knife and trying to nicely and evenly cut that stuff up. Also, it's much less hazardous AND it's super easy to clean. Thank you, Chop Chop inventor - you just made my meals 30% more healthy. 


2. Garlic Press. I saw this neat little device at my brothers apartment a month or so ago. Matt and I were both fascinated by it. A very simple machine in nature, but so powerful. 

(I just considered using Luke Skywalker & friends trapped in the garbage disposal of the Death Star from Episode I (or IV if you count those stupid prequels) as an allusion to what the garlic press does, but figured showing a picture was a better reference) 


No more chopping garlic up in a plastic bag with a hammer... you know to keep your hands from smelling like garlic for the next 24-36 hours. Now, we could put cloves upon cloves of garlic in whatever we wanted in a matter of minutes. Also, cleaning this contraption is super easy and not time consuming.  I know garlic is a weird thing to love, but there are SO many health benefits to garlic. It is proven to assist in lowering cholesterol, blood pressure and it's a natural antibiotic. Garlic = Awesomeness. 


So those are the two big things that have made a huge difference in what Matt and I cook. The other day we made the most AMAZING Quesadillas. We drove by a Taco Bell on our way home from Kroger and I immediately went into crave mode. I wanted a steak quesadilla in the worst way and if Matt had consented to a quick drive-thru pitstop, I wouldn't have felt guilty... until about 5 minutes after consuming that quesadilla in approximately 3 minutes. 
Well, instead of wasting money on crappy food (that tastes Oh so good), we made quesadillas ourselves using: 


1. Two whole wheat, all natural tortillas. 
2. Grilled organic onions, pepper, and garlic. 
3. Grilled organic chicken. 
4. Organic Black Beans
3. Trader Joes shredded cheese... which is, of course, organic. 
4. Organic sour cream. 


Let me just say - they were the BEST quesadillas either of us had ever consumed. We finished the meal off with some white wine . Awesome. It was also awesome, because we both worked on the meal. It was so much fun cooking with him. Matt is always encouraging me to experiment with the ingrediants we have in our cabinets. He's just wonderful like that... oh, and btw, he also happens to be a better cook and MUCH more knowledgeable about the kitchen than me. So between my experimenting and his expertise, we make a pretty good team :)